Living with insecurity BEFORE I knew what a blessing from God it really was!
So after moving around alot and continuing to try to fit in at every school I was at (13 schools) I started to get good at being popular even though I didn’t have the normal neccesities to popularity. I definately was not prom queen, or class president, but people in each place at least knew that I existed and generally seemed to like me. In 1993 I moved for the last time from Toledo, Ohio to Shamokin, Pa. What a huge culture shock, I was so used to trying desperately to fit in, and now I moved to this small town of 7,000 some and I was immediately welcomed with open arms. I was in the last month of sophmore year surrounded with students that had known eachother since Pre-k…lol Yet, they were welcoming, more welcoming than any other school or town that I had ever lived in. It felt great! It was like I had been there all along. Most people think that you know, you live in a small town and can’t wait for the big city. My experience was the very opposite, I went from a big city nobody to a small town somebody. It was a blessing, I wasn’t feeling near as unworthy, I had gained more confidence than I ever remember having, I had come home. The home I always longed to be. All those years of trying so hard, and now I didn’t have to try so hard, but I still did try to be the nicest, the happiest and a worthy friend to all I met. It was an intricate part of my personality now. And no matter what I did whether being a high school student, a college student, or as a waitress my personality was now naturally over the top.
And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are
more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows. Luke 12:7