Faith Walking


Life has been crazy and I haven’t sat down to write in awhile. I have been thinking daily about it though. Every time I get an idea to write, I make a mental note but miss that moment when I am most excited about it. So, here I am back at it. The ministry is coming along, hoping to have all the paper work finished for the 501 c-3 done by this week, then just the wait. My daughter Gabby who was diagnosed with Perthes disease,  just diagnosed with it in her other hip, bummer BUT my God is bigger than any of our earthly circumstances so I am putting it in His hands. My other daughter just turned 12 years old, and she is growing into a beautiful young woman, but nevertheless embarking on the hardest years of a girls life.

My spiritual life is well and God has been showing me and leading me through refining since the store closed. It is a time of testing and truly trusting the Lord alone. It is scary but is yielding good fruit.

Money is always an issue. Although Gino has a good job, we are still spread thin and debt looming over head from our former venture of GiGi’s. I am trusting that the Lord is going to work it out in His time in His way, But, I won’t deny that the furnace is getting hot. Gino is learning to trust my instinct and ability to hear God. Also, I believe it is a call to him and his life as well. I had a thought a few weeks back while getting ready one morning that God had big plans for Gino and that Gino’s faith would grow strong. I am waiting for that deliverance and am excited for that time in our lives of believing together.

I am still counseling with Center of Hope and truly love that role. I have met some amazing clients and have established lasting relationships.

I will continue to Walk in Faith to what God is calling me to do.

God put a million, million doors in the world
For his love to walk through
One of those doors is you- Jason Gray

Prayer Fail?


It is time that I write a praise report.


I wrote  to you and told about the new chapter in our lives. I also talked about my daughter Gabby’s diagnosis of Perthes disease and the dreaded waiting game.

We were back for an appointment after waiting 2 months, and also after reading up thoroughly on the disease itself and what we would be up against. Unfortunately, Gabby had all the risk factors that make her diagnosis worse case scenario. ( Risk factors- 1-Age(best if diagnosed by 6, she’s 8) Weight- (Gabby is short and stocky) Early detection ( 1 year of symptoms before diagnosis for Gab)

These were all scary facts. Even though I was praying and praying for healing and restoration I still had my doubts, like any parent would.


The appointment went well at first. The Dr. said according to the new set of x-rays what was left of the femoral head hadn’t deteriorated any further. I was thanking Jesus, thinking it was a good thing. But, the Dr. went on to say that this was A typical for Perthes disease, and that he was now unsure of his origin al diagnosis. He even went as far to say it could be  tumor and that he would like to see her back in 3 month for  a biopsy and contrast MRI. I was stunned to say the least. It actually took me hours to comprehend what he had said.


After discussing it with my husband, and conferring with the online support group, we decided to get a second opinion. I called a noted facility in a neighboring town and was able to get a appointment fairly quickly.


We went with disc’s of the x-rays in hand and waited with anxiety to see what this Dr. would say about what he saw on the x-rays.


He came in and quite confidently said, he did not think it was a tumor, and even better, he did not think she needed surgery either. He said she was in the regrowth process and as long as she did not do

any weight bearing activities ( soccer, basketball) that we just have to allow the body to do it’s thing.

We couldn’t have been happier, and more importantly relieved.


The next answered prayer is something I wrote about last year.

Months went by and I continued to pray fervently everyday for the owner of the tracker with the bumper sticker that so saddened my heart ” Nothing fails like prayer”. Then the roadwork came into play. The tracker was forced to park in another spot due to the roadwork, and so out of the eye shot of every passerby. I was happy about that, but still broke my heart that someone was so broken and angry to believe that statement.

The roadwork went on for a few months. Out of sight out of mind. Then Bam, I am driving along this street where now the mid 90’s tracker is BACK.


But, with something noticeably missing. The Bumper Sticker. It’s GONE, the remnants are left of the glue that held it fast to the soft top. The glue is black from the dirt that collected under it. I screamed! Woohoo! My girls looked at me as if I was crazy. My mind was fluttering with ideas. My prayer had been answered. But, why? Lord, did you change the person’s heart, like I had prayed for? Are they just going to sell it, and needed to remove the stickers? But, it’s such an old model, would they really be selling it? I may never know what the answer is. I pray that my prayers prompted God to reveal himself to this person and their life has been changed forever. Maybe that moment I enter the pearly gates, I will be greeted by someone I have never actually met in this life.

All I can say is ” Nothing prevails like prayer”

Matthew 7:7 “Ask, and it will be given to you seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

Matthew 21:22 And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.”

Mark 11:24 Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

John 14:13-14 Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it

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I am Restless

I am in a funk… A stalemate.. Writer’s block…Jesus block… Restless…

Oh how I hate feeling like this. Struggling to feel, smell, sense God presence, but it alludes me.

Since last week I am just depleted. The rhetoric of war, weary from the nay sayers, hurting for the persecuted. Hurting so deep inside that my heart is being squeezed. Desperate for clarity and vision to see the ones that I love saved, just to give me an ounce of piece of mind. Hurting for the cancer ridden, drug addicted, grieving parents, grieving children.

Sadness surrounds me at every turn in every possible way it can possibly take form. “Marty, you can’t save the world”, “Why are you heartsick over another broken family”? “There’s nothing you can do to change it”.

Logically I know all these things, yes, I understand that I cannot save the world, but yet my heart aches, I feel helpless. I believe in the power of prayer, I believe our Lord can deliver, but is it HIS WILL to deliver every soul that I pray for? I am sure not. I’m sure this is where Satan (I hate that spellcheck makes me capitalize his name he doesn’t deserve it) plays on my emotions, and on my mind. He whispers in my ear, “What makes you think your prayers go anywhere”, Do you know how many people are suffering in the world? Don’t waste your breath”, “Marty, maybe your families next”. “Is this all really worth it Marty? This God you can’t see? Is he worth losing family and friends”?

Satan is constantly playing on my mind, and although I am down, I am NOT OUT! I will be darned if I allow him to do this to me. To worry, to second guess, to feel useless, and restless.

I am truly restless for peace, for unconditional love, that is only found somewhere other than this world. I am restless for abounding grace, no pain, no fear, safety, certainty.

Lord, I beg you to let me feel your presence again, even a week without it, can make me go mad. Lord, I pray that you fill my heart back up with joy, peace and thanksgiving. Lord, I ask you to send your warring angels to come and surround me so that the enemy will flee.

My friend posted this yesterday on her facebook page, and it brought me some peace.

“…the great thing to remember is that, though our feelings come and go, His love for us does not. It is not wearied by our sins, or our indifference; and, therefore, it is quite relentless in its determination that we shall be cured of those sins, at whatever cost to us, at whatever cost to Him.”

~ Mere Christianity

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